Local Man Programs Own Workout, Reprograms Five Reps In

Fort Worth– After six weeks of performing heavily-modified versions of workouts found at CrossFit.com, James McNewb decided to try his hand at programming. The 34-year-old purchased as small whiteboard from an office supply store, and began crafting what he knew would be a masterpiece.

McNewb started by skimming a number of programming-related articles he found in the CrossFit Journal.

“I saw a lot of words like ‘simple’, ‘elegant’, and ‘couplet’,” he explained. “That was obviously talking about programming for beginners, so I ignored all of it.”

McNewb set out to create a workout that used virtually all of the equipment in his gym, and featured every CrossFit movement he had performed to date.

“I kept thinking, why has nobody at CrossFit published anything this awesome before? Most of the workouts they make only have 2-3 movements and use easily memorable rep-schemes. I was breaking new ground.”

The final product was a haphazard combination of heavy squats, kettlebell-swings, sit-ups, air-squats, thrusters, pull-ups, box-jumps, snatches, double-unders, squat cleans, and an 800-meter run carrying a 20 pound medicine ball.

McNewb set out to complete 5 rounds of his monstrous creation for time, but his plans changed rapidly after the workout began.

“I picked up the bar and started my first set of 27 squats. On the fifth rep, I was hit with a sickening sense of fear. I thought ‘what have I done?'”

Within the first minute, McNewb mentally noted that his workout was now only 3 rounds for time. 20 minute slater, McNewb completed his first round.

After 5 more minutes of mostly starting at a barbell on the floor, McNewb mentally noted that his workout was actually at 30 minute AMRAP. He rested for the remaining 30 seconds, completing a total of 1 round and 3 reps.

McNewb plans to unveil his creation to his friends during their weekly group workout, but intends to add a 100 GHD sit-up “cash-out” to the event.

“I think it’s going to be a really well-programmed workout once I get the kinks worked out,” he confirmed.