CrossFit Affiliate Announces Exclusive ‘Competitor’s Class,’ Expects No Drama

Darrin Afton, owner of CrossFit Credulous, has announced a new “Competitor’s Class” as part of his gym’s weekly schedule. Unlike the daily group classes that any of his 200 members can attend, this new class will only be for those Afton deems the “top athletes” in the gym.

“We are looking to develop the competitive aspect of CrossFit in our community,” Afton explained. “We have never really focused on competitions before, and having a weekly class for a small, dedicated group of our gym’s best athletes seems like the place to start.”

Afton, who put $1000 on Conor McGregor Knocking out Mayweather in the first round, predicts that fostering a sense of entitlement among his better athletes will cause him zero future headaches.

“I don’t foresee any problems with telling some members they are special, creating a new class for them, and elevating them in status above my regular members,” Afton said. “It certainly won’t change the culture of my gym.”

Afton also predicts the process of selecting his top athletes, and announcing that selection, will go smoothly.

“Because CrossFit has made fitness a quantifiable term, who we pick is all about the math,” Afton observed. “I can’t imagine anyone experiencing any bitterness, jealousy, or back-biting over not being selected.”